Thursday, December 27, 2007
yup, its totally gross... im related to these bunch of people that are totally inhumane and sick. no this isnt one of those emo/slash my wrist things... but really my family is terrible. not my immediate one persay, but to ones distantly related like .... my entire paternal side family..
im so tired of them! just example.. the biggest arguement ever happened a while ago. ( btween my mom and dad) and so i talked to my grampy and he said that we would have a conference( meeting .. wtv) with the reat of the family tonight.. so i show up and its actually tomorrow. why didnt anyone tell me? what was my input not imp0ortant? i was to represent my sister and mom, they conveniently didnt tell me.. showing that it didnt matter,.. while this whole freakking conference is about me and my mom/sis... and our safety from my raving lunatic excuse of a dad.
Im taking this seriously, this is my life.,.. my mothers health and safety ..our well being we are discussing... how we are in danger. And obviously it isnt important to them, what is important is that we ( I mom and sis) arent 'loving our father' enough and so driving him to take drugs and that i was rude in demanding where the conference was instead of saying hello, and declining eating with them.
the story is really more complicated than this. i could write a book, on this family. i feel gross that i am related to them.. i am angry that they dont care about us. dissapointed because i thought they cared. i would like to leave. and we will.. away from the crazy mafia family, i dont care about money. i dont need theirs.. ill work my ass off whatever it takes.. i dont wanna touch them. my cousin called up for lunch.. andim not sure if i wanna go. i am totally hurt and upset, i dont want to see them at all. even for a civilised lunch. where i know my aunt will say something.. and i will burst out. one day ( very very soon ) we are going to go away. right now arrangements are going to be made.
If i loived in a fairy tale world, the bad guys would be caught and fed to fire breathing dragons, and i will leave peacefully ever after. coz everyone knows happily ever after doesnt exist .
my whole christmas this year has been the most eventful, ill remeber the eve of christmas 2007, as the one i spent even wondering if i had a place to stay that night.
